Posts tagged confused

I’m stressed and want to vent. If you’re pissed off by what you read, I apologize.

This whole job thing is getting a bit frustrating. After doing a “phone screening” with Citi bank, today, I am now waiting on a branch hiring manager to get in touch with me. While this is good news, in many ways, it also poses a problem: Can I take a job like that knowing that I won’t get to see Melanie more than two days a week, at most?

We’re both at different points in our lives and it’s hard to blend those points together, sometimes. I want to do what’s right for me and make enough money to sustain myself, yet I know, deep in my heart, that I need time with her. Maybe I’m just a stupid kid in love, but it’s what I am.

So, what do I do? I don’t know, to be honest. I’m stressed beyond belief trying to figure this one out. A middle ground solution would be to let the Citi situation play itself out and see if I even get a job offer, but, at the same time, not go back to the position I love at work and stay in the spot I am currently in. I can, probably, work out a pay raise and extra hours from it, though it’d officially be part time and still not like my work.

The problem with that idea is the lack of benefits and I need benefits. I don’t know what to do. My mind is racing a mile a minute and I’m not ready to leave the starting line. I have to figure this gigantic puzzle out and make a major life decision when I’m simply not ready to do so.

I’ve heard your advise. I know what most people will say, so please leave it be. No matter what I choose, people will be pissed off and say I’m wrong. It’s a lose – lose situation and I know it. Lucky me.