Middle Ground
Middle Ground (11/30/2005)
At times, inside, there are two voices screaming
Both of them yelling about everything I’m feeling
One filled with rage and burdened down with hate
The other is struggling to just find his place
So I hide in disgrace and keep you at a distance
I give in a little and then show some resistance
Cause I don’t even know who the fuck I should be
I’m here at a place with this stuff stuck in me
Yet, you trust in me, as if I deserve it
Is there a point or a motive, an alternative purpose?
A vision distorted with these two different versions
It’s a weight that leaves me here feeling so burdened
But, perhaps I deserve it, and I should keep bleeding
And get used to the life and these two voices screaming
As the fire is leaving, I feel more like a quitter
Everyday that I fade, it’s so cold like the winter
Frozen and lonely and nobody knows me
Few people see the whole truth that is flowing
The pain isn’t slowing, but just changing with time
To be more like confusion that is choking my mind
I’m done and I’m finished, I can’t even write this
My brain is a blank, this confusion is mindless
Don’t ever mind this, I just need to keep venting
The thoughts in my heart that can be so upsetting
I don’t think that I’m ready, but here comes the rush
The chaos inside that leaves me with one lust
To find my own middle and balance it out
And find my own voice between silent and loud
Notes: A little simplistic in structure. This one is about the feeling of having two different people inside you and being left so worn out and torn between which way to go.
Filed under: Poems