Xpression.v2

It’s been a while since I’ve written a journal entry. Honestly, I don’t know what to write about.

Life has been pretty stagnant lately. It’s either work or nothing. I personally can’t wait for CCD and Regina Basketball to start up again so that I have something constructive to do. I’m definitely more excited about coaching since the CCD program is in shambles and I have a feeling it’s going to be more stress than anything else. As long as I have coaching, though, I’ll be fine. I miss that adrenaline so much. I always joked about how I was too old for all that chaos, but I’ll never be too old for it. It’s invigorating and stimulating all at the same time. It makes me think and act and lead all at once. In other words, it’s nice.

I have other things on my mind, but I’m finding that this place is a little more claustophobic than it used to be. People actually read this shit now and pay attention. In my writing, there’s still a level of privacy built on the fact that people often misinterpret what I write about. While some special people even manage to miss what I’m saying in my journals, they are far fewer in number. It almost makes me feel paranoid, at times. It’s as though all these eyes are looking at me, staring, waiting for me to make a move. Yet, if they looked away, I would be just as uncomfortable.

Man, I feel so lethargic. I want to get back into shape, but I find myself exhausted and aching from work on my days off. If it wasn’t for my metabolism and my severely lacking diet, I would probably weigh about three thousand pounds right now. That makes me sound like a girl, doesn’t it? It’s always amusing to hear a girl complain about their weight. No matter how skinny they are, I always get the urge to say, “Stop your whining, chubby”.

That kind of randomness means I’m out of ideas. I still like Maria and thoroughly enjoyed hanging out with her. I still hate work. I still buy way too many Russian mail order brides.

Filed under: Journal